


Holding On

by orphan_account



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Bones is a stubborn old goat, Established Relationship, Fluff, Hospitalization, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Old Age, concerned spock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:47:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23872627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: After the death of their husband, James Tiberius Kirk, life goes on for Spock and Doctor McCoy.While the sands of time relentlessly continue to slip through their fingers, the years pass, and the two manage to carry on as usual. That is, until one day, when Spock learns that McCoy has been hospitalized due to a work-related accident, forcing him to reflect on the fragility of human life.
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy/Spock
Comments: 8
Kudos: 51





	Holding On

Spock checked over the controlled lab results carefully. The Vulcan Science Academy had asked for his assistance designing a new prototype of a ship capable of enduring deep space distortions, and possibly capable of crossing between universes governed by different quantum laws then our own. Trans-universal space travel had become the new final frontier. It was incredible to think that only one hundred years ago, mapping the known universe was considered to be breaking new ground for science. Now, new technology revealed the existence of multiple universes occurring simultaneously, overlapping one another, ours being one of an infinite many, and the duty of exploring and studying each and every one of these seemed a daunting task.

The ever-shifting realm of science fascinated Spock, so he was more than willing to assist his home planet in taking the next step in multiverse space exploration, even though the Vulcan High Council still looked dis-favorably upon him and his marriage to two illogical and emotive humans.

 _Although not even the Council can deny that Leonard McCoy is an extraordinary man,_ Spock though, amused as he recalled how the fiery doctor had stood in front of the seven Vulcan ministers and berated them for their "inexcusably hare-brained" and "plumb stupid" attempts to control the outbreak of a virus that had been spreading exponentially over Vulcan several years back.

Spock was scanning over the last page of the report when the communicator on the desk buzzed.

'Ambassador Spock, we have intercepted a message for you from the Central Hospital of Altair IV.' Spock paused and looked up from the report.

'Apparently, your husband had an accident. They request your presence immediately.'

Spock rose to his feet with sudden urgency. "What happened to the doctor?" He asked.

'One moment, Ambassador.' There was silence on the other end for a while. Then, 'The hospital will not permit us to access any further information concerning the accident. They simply request that you make haste to the hospital on Altair IV.'

"Inform them I am on my way."

* * *

Spock entered the hospital, attempting to calm his nerves, which had grown increasingly frayed ever since receiving the news of McCoy’s hospitalization on Vulcan.

The woman at the front desk looked up. "Ambassador Spock, they're expecting you on the 5th floor.” She informed him curtly. “The elevator is just down the hall." She pointed.

Spock had barely uttered a quiet 'thank you' before he headed in the direction the receptionist had indicated, entered the elevator, and pressed the button for the correct floor with an air of urgency. As if sensing his mood, the button let out a pitiful 'ping' registering his request for the fifth floor.

Spock tapped his foot with uncharacteristic and very unVulcan-like impatience as the numbers over the double door increased incrementally. All these years of living with his husbands and saturated with their human emotions seemed to have rubbed off on him.

Finally, the elevator opened, and Spock was met with a hospital orderly.

"Ambassador, the front desk just called. Your husband is in room ZP700. Please allow me to escort you."

"What happened to him?" Spock asked, right to the point, as they were walking.

"From what we've been told, an oxygen fuel tank exploded in the engine room. The ship went down on a nearby moon, and in the crash, your husband was injured by a steel cylinder in the engine room that hadn't been secured down properly and burst free of its fastenings. It crushed several of his rib bones, one of which punctured his lungs. If the medical staff hadn't reached him in time, his lungs would have filled up with blood and he would have suffocated to death."

"Crash protocol dictates that all personnel are to be confined to their respective zones aboard the ship. Why was Doctor McCoy in the engine room?" Spock asked with a slight edge.

"No one seems quite sure, Ambassador. All the medical staff say is that shortly after the order was sent out, your husband left to go to the engine room."

They reached room ZP700 just as a frantic nurse scurried out.

Her hurry greatly alarmed Spock, and he quickly pushed past and into the room, where Doctor McCoy could be seen lying on a bed amidst a tangle of tubes. Another nurse attending the room turned at his entrance. "Ambassador, thank goodness you're here." In bed, McCoy's eyes locked on him.

"Spock!" The doctor rasped. "Thank God! Now you can help me with this nurse who's tryin' to goddamn kill me!" 

He went on. "And tell that one outside to stop bringing me goddamn glasses of water and get me some painkillers!"

The nurse turned to McCoy. "Sir, I've already told you. We just gave you two doses of painkillers. You'll need to wait another hour before we can give you more."

"Says who?"

The nurse hedges. McCoy grumbles, "You get out there and tell them your patient needs painkillers, and if they don't like it, they can answer to me!"

"Sir, I'm not authorized to-"

"Don't tell me you're not goddamn authorized! I'm a doctor. I know what you're authorized to do! Now get me some damn painkillers!"

The nurse sighed and looked helplessly at Spock. "He's been like this since he woke up. Could you please speak with him?"

Spock's fear was replaced with mild amusement. "Affirmative. I will speak with my husband."

The nurse looked greatly relieved as she stepped aside to give the Vulcan Ambassador room.

"McCoy..." Spock greeted softly, reaching down to clasp the doctor's thin hand.

"Spock." McCoy gave his hand a gentle squeeze. "I sure am glad you're here," he said in a soft rasp. "I’m sorry that they pulled you away from work. I tried to tell them it wasn't necessary. I'm really fine." The doctor said before his speech devolved into a series of raspy coughs.

"Water, sir?" The nurse said on the other side of the bed, holding out the glass McCoy had so vehemently disdained earlier. The bedridden doctor narrowed his eyes. He turned to Spock.

"You see the way she treats me?" he grumbled. All the same, the doctor begrudgingly allowed the nurse to hold the water while he clutched the glass with a trembling hand and brought it to his mouth.

"Do not worry about my work. You are always my first priority, Doctor." Spock said, letting out a small smile before continuing a bit more sternly. "It has come to my attention that you were injured because you went into the engine room of your ship against safety protocol. Why would you do such a thing?"

McCoy gave a quiet scoff. "Why would I do such a thing, indeed. I wanted to check whether there were any survivors of the explosion who needed help," He explained gruffly. "There weren't. Just a damn coolant tank that wasn't secured down properly. But I wouldn't have been able to forgive myself if I'd left injured men to suffer and die alone."

Spock felt both proud and terribly frustrated at McCoy's stubbornness. He had never felt such contradictory feelings as deeply with anyone besides the doctor. Except, of course, his other husband, James Kirk. 

"You are an old fool, doctor." Spock said tenderly, "But when I first met you, you were a young fool, so I suppose it could be said I knew what I was getting into." McCoy felt both offended and complemented. He imagined that was exactly how Spock wanted him to feel. 

The old doctor gave him an ironic smile. "And you've stayed just the same as always, you stubborn, thick-headed Vulcan."

There was a certain, unique fondness in his words. Then he seemed to catch himself and grunted, "Now how's about convincing that young lady over there to bring me something for this pain?"

Spock turned to the nurse, politely asking, "Can you give him anything more?"

The nurse was silent for a moment, seemingly in quiet debate with herself. "I'll see what I can do." She said finally, and strode from the room.

"Oh, I see. Listen to the Vulcan Ambassador." McCoy grumbled. "You know, there ain't no benefit to being the ambassador's husband, but being the ambassador himself, well that's another matter."

"I suppose that means you will have to keep me around so as to have an advantage." Spock suggested.

"I suppose so." McCoy answered archly. He looked at the door. "She probably won't be back for a while." The doctor mused, seemingly to himself. He turned back to Spock. "Come here. Lean down." He said and beckoned with a bony finger.

Spock had learned from years of experience, it was best to obey such commands from the doctor

His frail limbs trembling slightly, McCoy propped himself up in bed and kissed Spock. "I love you, you know that?"

"I am thankful for it every day, Doctor." Spock said, "which is why I'm going to stay with you until you are fully healed."

McCoy's expression softened slightly. "You know, Spock, I'm damn certain you kept me alive today. For a minute, while I was trapped under that cylinder, I really thought it was the end for me. But then I thought of you, and I told myself, 'Leonard McCoy, for God's sake, pull yourself together. You can't let the hobgoblin beat you like this!'"

"I am happy that your self-imposed challenge to outlive me elicited enough spite to help you survive." Spock chuckled.

McCoy also chuckled before he began coughing again.

"Where is that nurse?" He muttered to himself cantankerously.

Spock looked fondly at his husband, but there was deep concern faintly evident in his features. As much as they would joke about McCoy's furious battle to outlive his own biologically longer lifespan, internally, Spock sincerely wished that the doctor would succeed. He didn't want to live to see both his husbands’ deaths, and was convinced the loss might break him.

His shift in expression did not go unnoticed by the doctor. McCoy shifted in bed, looking at the Vulcan squarely. "Alright, I know that look. Something's bothering you. What's on your mind, Spock?"

The Vulcan got on his knees beside the bed so as to be more eye-level with the doctor. "I am beginning to realize that... I do not want to see you die." Spock parsed his words out carefully.

The words sank in, and the doctor's gruff facade fell. "Oh, Spock..." He reached out and brushed the Vulcan's wrinkled cheek with his hand. "I know. And I hope to God I have the strength to keep that from happening." Then the doctor choked up slightly, "but, I'm also coming to realize that I don't much like the alternative, either."

"Doctor..." Spock trailed off. "Forgive me. You surprise me. I had always thought someone in your profession would have become normalized to the concept of death."

"Never." The strength of McCoy's response shocked Spock. The doctor appeared to notice this and continued more softly. "Never. After all these years, I've never gotten used to seeing my patients die." The doctor paused for a while, his eyes moving about the room, as if searching for something. Spock realized how small and fragile McCoy looked lying there, yet he found himself hanging on to his every word.

"Let me make this absolutely clear. There is nothing normal about death, Spock. There's nothing ‘natural’ about it. One moment, there's a living being beside you, with their own thoughts and feelings, and the next second, they're gone. Vanished without a trace, leaving you with nothing but an empty shell, a teasing reminder of what once was."

Spock sat there, unsure just what to say in response to that. Just then, the nurse entered.

"Good news. They're allowing you one extra dosage, but no more for the next hour and a half." On the bed, McCoy cleared his throat, adjusting to the sudden shift in the conversation. "Thank you. I appreciate it."

The nurse dutifully attached the vial of clear liquid to the IV drip beside the bed. Finished, she turned to them. "Do you need anything else, sir? Ambassador?"

McCoy shook his head, and Spock held up his hand. "I believe we're both fine for now. Thank you."

"My pleasure. If something comes up, there's a communicator on the wall. Press the blue button if you need anything." The nurse said before turning on her heels and exiting the room.

"Doctor, may I?" Spock said, gesturing to the side of the bed

"Be my guest." McCoy replied with the wave of a hand.

Spock takes a tentative seat before fixing his eyes on the doctor again. "Again, I cannot express how relieved I am that you are all right." 

"You don't have to express anything. I can tell." McCoy replied with a small bobbing of his head. "You're more than I could ever ask for, Spock."

"I feel the same about you Doctor." Spock said, cupping the Doctor's cheek, "Although, perhaps I love you a percentage more." The Vulcan added teasingly, another mannerism he’d picked up from his husbands.

"Normally, I'd disagree with you, but I'm in no mood for arguing. I've got to save my strength for that nurse when she comes back."

"I'll have to ask that you do not frighten the poor hospital staff any further, Doctor." Spock said, amused 

"Bah. They say a little fear is good for the soul."

Spock raised an amused eyebrow. "'They,' Doctor?"

McCoy shifted and grumbled, "Well, at least I do."

Suddenly, he devolved into another coughing fit. Spock looked on, concerned.

"Is there anything I can do for you, Leonard?" Spock asked as soon as his coughing had settled down. McCoy grunted, "You could hand me that thrice-damned glass of water." 

Spock's lip quirked. 

"Of course."

After finishing off the glass of water, McCoy settled back once more against the plush hospital bed. He gave a raspy sigh and closed his eyes. After a while, Spock reached out and placed his hand over the doctor's. Without opening his eyes, the corner of McCoy's lip curled upward in a small smile. Spock felt the doctor's frail fingers intertwine with his own, and he tightened his grip ever so slightly.

As the two held one another, Spock was vaguely aware of another two pairs of hands-- stubbornly clutching at the invisible thread of time.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! Thanks for reading up to this point. 
> 
> This is my first work I've posted on this site. Comments and feedback are much appreciated!


End file.
